Today marks a new chapter, A dawn of hope, a dream fulfilled. The wait is over; the search has ceased, Happiness and peace, now released. Birds sing sweet melodies above, A symphony of joy, a labor of love. The sunset's warmth on skin so fair, A gentle reminder of life's care. In this moment, all feels right, A sense of calm, a peaceful night. The world's vibrant colors shine bright, A reflection of your inner light. May this blissful feeling stay, Guiding you through life's ebb and flow. May your heart remain full and free, Basking in happiness and serenity." Keep embracing this beautiful feeling! Life's journey is often marked by unexpected twists and turns, testing our resolve and resilience. Delays, denials, disappointments, rejections, and failures can shake our confidence, making our desires and expectations seem elusive. In these moments, self-doubt creeps in, and we blame our imperfections for life's setbacks. Looking into challenges that could make you want to give up on Life or you feel like nothing is working; For instance, someone who has been trying all possible means to japa (travel abroad) but keeps being rejected, a woman who is looking up to God for a child but now she doubts her chances to conceive, someone who has been looking for a job despite several interviews but still awaits a call for an employment, someone who has been searching and waiting for a life partner but no suitor in sight yet ...we can keep listing as they never end. The way we deal with such situations is what drives our wild imaginations, allows negativity to creep into our lives and we believe there is no hope for happy endings. Despite seeking comfort in our daily routines, past successes, and loving relationships, life's unpredictability can leave us feeling overwhelmed. Yet, it's precisely how we respond to these challenges that defines us. What are the Common Emotional Responses we give/have? 1. Frustration and anger 2. Disappointment and sadness 3. Self-doubt and low self-esteem 4. Fear and anxiety 5. Helplessness and hopelessness Remember, life's rollercoaster is inevitable, but our mindset and response can transform struggles into stepping stones for personal growth, wisdom, and strength. Additional thoughts: • Life's challenges are not reflections of our worth. • Imperfections are essential to the human experience. • Resilience is built through navigating adversity. • Self-compassion is key to healing and growth. • Every setback prepares us for future successes. Maintaining happiness and peace amidst life's challenges requires intentional habits, mindset shifts, and self-care practices. Here are some strategies: Resilience Builders • Gratitude practice: Focus on the good. Cultivate gratitude for life's blessings. • Positive self-talk: Encourage yourself. • Mindfulness: Stay present. • Self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness. • Emotional regulation: Manage stress. Acknowledge your emotions, rather than suppressing them. Coping Mechanisms • Deep breathing exercises. • Physical activity: Release endorphins. • Journaling: Process emotions. • Connect with nature: Find calm. • Creative expression: Art, music, writing. Support Systems • Nurture meaningful relationships. • Seek professional help (therapy). • Join a supportive community. • Practice forgiveness: Let go of grudges. • Prioritize sleep and rest. Mindset Shifts • Reframe setbacks as opportunities for growth. • Practice acceptance: Embrace uncertainty. • Focus on the present: Let go of past/future worries. • Cultivate optimism: Expect positive outcomes. • Develop problem-solving skills. Self-Care • Prioritize activities bringing joy. • Set boundaries: Protect time/energy. • Engage in relaxation techniques (meditation, yoga). • Take breaks: Rest and recharge. • Practice self-forgiveness. Faith-Based Encouragement: 1. God's timing is perfect, even when ours isn't. 2. Prayer and faith can shift circumstances. 3. Every "no" or delay brings us closer to the right "yes." 4. Our worth isn't defined by achievements or outcomes. 5. God's plans are bigger than our current struggles. Inspiring Stories from the Bible: 1. Hannah's prayer for a child (1 Samuel 1-2) 2. Joseph's journey from slavery to leadership (Genesis 37-47) 3. Ruth's perseverance in relationships (Ruth 1-4) 4. David's trust in God during adversity (Psalm 23, 27) Inspiring Quotes "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." - Charles R. Swindoll "Happiness is not something ready-made. It comes from your own actions." - Dalai Lama "You are stronger than you seem, braver than you believe, and smarter than you think." - Christopher Robin "Fall seven times, stand up eight." - Japanese proverb "The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." - Nelson Mandela Keep shining, and remember that life's ups and downs are an integral part of its beauty and transformative power! Happiness and Peace are journeys, not destinations!

# # # # Guy: Hey Beautiful! Girl: Hello Guy: Can I get to know you? Girl: oh ok....(thinking out loud)...eh God o, should I respond?...*smirks* They start talking and hanging out*** Guy: Hey Mo Girl: Baba o...twale...I dey hail oo ...*teases* Guy: I like you...You captivate me and I'd like us to take this friendship to another level. Girl: That'll be nice. I like you too. Make we see as e go be nah...*blushes* They start dating...meeting their friends and family*** Guy: Hey Sweetie Girl: Baby Love, What's up? Guy: My friends like you...thank you for your love and care... continue to be yourself and always tell me about your thoughts and feelings. Girl: I am a spec after all...lol...*teases* Guy: Please don't ever hurt my feelings ...*jokes* Girl: Yinmu...wetin dey do this one...I should be the one to say that Months after ....Mixed feelings emerge... Girl: Babe, I seem to be the last person on your mind these days....what's on your mind lately? Guy: I'm good, I'm just not feeling myself. I forget to check on you and get carried away with my daily activities. Girl: Really...*surprised* Guy: I think we should just be friends now. I feel choked up being in a relationship. It's not about you but me...You are a great person don't doubt it. Girl: Then, what is the problem? Guy: I can't explain it...My head is just not having this right now and I am not feeling any emotions for you. Girl: Feels disappointed, her love bruised and feelings hurt... All right, let me know when you feel better. *Good Bye* # # # # A rundown of this tactic mostly displayed by men is tagged as being "Emotionally Unavailable" and this often happens after a while of attraction and closeness to a partner. Suddenly, he starts to feel threatened in his freedom, space and emotions. Recognizing emotional unavailability can be tricky. Many emotionally unavailable people have a knack for making you feel great about yourself and hopeful about the future of your relationship. When they feel exhausted with their emotions, they shut down the ride. Most people will be emotionally unavailable at some point in their lives. We tend to pull back from engaging emotionally when we feel overwhelmed or have a lot of personal things that require our energy. Here are some common factors that can contribute to a man being emotionally unavailable: 1. Past trauma: Unresolved childhood wounds, abuse, or neglect can lead to emotional numbing. 2. Fear of vulnerability: Fear of being hurt or rejected can cause men to build walls around their emotions. 3. Societal expectations: Traditional masculine norms can discourage emotional expression and vulnerability. 4. Fear of intimacy: Fear of closeness or commitment can lead to emotional unavailability. 5. Attachment issues: Insecure attachment styles (e.g., avoidant or anxious) can make emotional connection challenging. 6. Emotional immaturity: Lack of emotional intelligence, self-awareness, or regulation skills can hinder emotional availability. 7. Defences and coping mechanisms: Substance abuse, workaholism, or other coping mechanisms can serve as distractions from emotional pain. 8. Past relationship experiences: Traumatic or painful past relationships can lead to emotional guardedness. 9. Mental health conditions: Depression, anxiety, or personality disorders can impact emotional availability. 10. Learned behaviour: Growing up with emotionally unavailable role models can teach men to suppress emotions. 11. Shame and guilt: Unresolved shame or guilt can lead to emotional numbing or unavailability. 12. Lack of emotional support: The absence of supportive relationships or role models can hinder emotional development. 13. Cultural or family dynamics: Cultural or family norms that discourage emotional expression can contribute to emotional unavailability. 14. Personal beliefs and values: Beliefs that emotions are a sign of weakness or that vulnerability is dangerous can lead to emotional unavailability. You might not want to settle for someone who isn’t exactly right. But this mindset can limit your ability to dedicate time and energy to someone who truly cares for you. It’s not always possible to find a “perfect” match, but you can still have a great relationship with someone who falls a little short of complete perfection. Being emotionally unavailable is not a cast in stone. It’s a complex issue, although, some underlying causes may be harder to overcome than others. However, it is a personal decision that needs to be made to have that great and positive change in your life. First and Foremost, be ready to break down that wall against your emotions - Be Vulnerable. Change only happens when someone is willing to work at creating it. No matter what type of relationship we’re talking about—be it friendship, familial, or romantic, vulnerability is key to fostering a closer, deeper, and more authentic bond with another person. It keeps us honest with each other and ourselves, breaks down walls, eliminates the potential for miscommunication and misunderstandings, and allows us to be worthy of our feelings. Gradually open up and share your feelings with your partner. Personal traits that can help you overcome being emotionally unavailable: • Be Aware and Mindful: Recognize your emotions, patterns and triggers. Focus on the present and let go of past hurts or traumas. • Trust God Always: No matter the fears and traumas you may have gone through or have at the moment, Prayer heals faster than you can imagine. Prayer is a powerful tool for emotional healing and growth. Devote your life to God regardless of the situation or circumstances around you. Don't be consumed by the impact caused by negative results or bad experiences. Be patient with your time to heal and grow. • Be Resilient: If you fail at something now, you will win some other time. Learn to recover quickly from difficult situations that may have hurt your emotions. This makes it easy to allow something new without predicting the end from the beginning. • Love Regardless: Don't be receptive to Love expressed towards you and as expected of you to retaliate. Our good emotions are curled from loving someone or something back regardless of how we interpret the other person's feelings or actions. A Loving Heart heals faster from hurts and rejection. • Show Empathy: Practice understanding and compassion towards yourself and others. Everyone is going through something in their lives and may just need that show of affection from you to heal or get better. Your love towards others requires you to be kind and considerate and should be unwavering any day, anytime. • Grow Out of your Fears: You could list the common fears that trigger your emotions such as losing your freedom, being trapped, being responsible for others, being betrayed, being judged, trusting others, uncertainty, rejection, intimacy, and inability to Love someone back. Be gentle with yourself and don't hesitate to seek help when needed. Grow Up! • Setting your Priorities Right: Most of the time, your inability to manage your activities and time effectively, clouds your emotions. You tend not to get things in the right order or perspective due to stress and anxiety. Setting priorities is essential for emotional clarity and well-being. You will have deeper and more meaningful connections when you put relationships and activities that bring joy as a top priority. • Seek True Companionship: A true companion can help you to be emotionally available in so many ways; thereby giving you their Emotional Support, Listening Hears, Understanding Heart, Unwavering Love, Open Mind, Unconditional Acceptance, Emotional Intimacy, and Sense of Belonging. Since your partner is offering this much, you should show yourself to be ready for a change by self-reflection, and be trustworthy, consistent and secure. • Stay Humble: By staying humble, you'll be more open, receptive, and willing to learn, grow and connect with others on a deeper emotional level. "If you are not a Safe Haven, you cannot seek shelter yourself."

Beep...beep...beep...beep...beep! I can hear that sound, but it is coming from afar... I keep wandering in this unknown and quiet place that looks like a white background tunnel with no end... I can still hear the beeping sound of my heartbeat coming from an electrocardiogram machine... What is happening to me? Why can't I move my body? Where am I? Who are those people crying? Oh No! Am I dying? Somebody wake me up...I need to wake up... HELP ME! HELP ME!! HELP ME!!! Amid the chaos, we can never hear that cry of a lost soul crying for help. At that moment, we are there trying to revive the body of that child, a mother, a father, a friend, or an unknown person whom the doctor has confirmed dead to us. It feels just like a bad dream happening right in front of us. None of us can accept the bad news and hope the doctor just comes back to say, "That was a mistake; she is doing just fine". Maybe a Miracle happens! A lost soul is someone who simply cannot function in society for several reasons. A person who sees no sense in things. The reasons for one being this way can vary from the loss of a loved one, the loss of a sense of purpose, losing the job that you love, or simply because you have grown into such a person that you feel you can't quite fit in anymore. Life is full of so many lost souls who are hoping to be heard either dead or alive. We go about our own lives and business every single day we wake up, doing the usual routine, going to work, going to the gym, taking the kids to school, attending meetings, having lunch with friends, going on dates, and the list goes on. Do we ever take a moment to find out what is going on around us or in the lives of the people we relate with every day? An innocent child being bullied in school would like to tell someone so he can be saved from those ill-mannered children... A man going through a tough time at work is hoping that won't be his last day or he won't give up on that dream job... A woman with kids who thinks she is fat just because her husband and friends say so... A lady who wishes that relationship or marriage would never end after several trials and wasted years. Yet, that man is seeing her to be unworthy... Looking at our own lives to be perfect is just a lie we tell ourselves in the mirror if we don't have a hint of kindness reflected in us. No matter how made or settled you are, your lack of compassion and empathy disqualifies you from being perfect. At any opportunity we get, we see other people not doing well around us or asking for help, to be so unfortunate, just because we believe that circumstance or situation should have been avoided if they had done this or that. It is worse when they try asking for your help and you grudgingly respond or decline. We avoid them like a plague so we don't get infected by their disease or problems. Meanwhile, that little time you spend hearing their problem counts. That love you can give shows you care. That short phone call you make to find a solution is lifesaving. That connection or contact you share could be the breakthrough they need. That confrontation or prayer you make for them could shut the mouths of the wicked ones. That advice you give could make a life change and better. That help you render could put a smile on someone's face. These are more rewarding than the part you play when the situation has gone bad and irredeemable. Without empathy and compassion, our pursuit of perfection is nothing more than a facade. It's a reminder that true beauty and perfection come from within and that our character and heart are what truly define us. And when the worst happens... We hear the loud cries of the child, the shouts from a parent, the yelling from a colleague, the abuse from a husband or wife, the fights from a household, the breakup from a partner and the screams of losing someone. Those listening ears would become active when it is too late and nothing can be done to reverse the situation... Could this have been avoided? *THAT FAR CRY.*

Meaning: Indecent: not conforming with generally accepted standards of behavior, especially in relation to sexual matters. Bid: an attempt or effort to achieve something. Indecency is no longer a strange act in this world of constant misbehavior; which is the cause of so many misfortunes. There is a race to becoming someone significant either you end up successful or not. All in all, this never-ending race entraps us to going the extra mile to get what we want or who we intend to be. Beware, it is mostly a copycat or an imitation of behavior that doesn't conform to our culture and ends up becoming an abuse to our supposed values. In the Western world, living independently is the phenomenon for accomplishments. You can freely do what pleases you or engage yourself in anything for survival. Resources are made available at your beck and call without much desperation. Their lifestyle is much more uncompromising for necessities and upkeep. Not to ignore the vices practiced; Theft, Prostitution, Abuse, Gambling etc, which are the factors that mostly drives their motive for survival. In the advent of finding your own race, there is usually fear of uncertainty. You become discouraged to achieve your goals and rather allow the failures of others overshadow your reasoning. Focusing on these challenges we face that results to Failure, Depression, Peer Pressure, etc, it is necessary to be cognizant of certain behavior in us that brings them to bear; * Negativity All in the bid for survival, you accept all that comes to you. You are relatively challenged of your behavior which often results to "Emotional Abuse". Nothing you do seems good to you because you have been told "you can't do it", "don't bother trying", "you know nothing", "it won't work" and so on. This is just the devil behind your hears trying to stop you from doing something great. Emotional abuse is a way to control another person by using emotions to criticize, embarrass, shame, blame, or otherwise manipulate another person. In general, a relationship is emotionally abusive when there is a consistent pattern of abusive words and bullying behaviors that wear down a person's self-esteem and undermine their mental health. * Addiction Due to Rejection, most people end up finding solace in substances or activities as a way to cure depression and anxiety. It only takes us through a short journey of ecstasy which fades away afterwards. Frequent intake of drugs, smoke, sex and practice of indecent activities often results to addiction that cannot be easily cured. The only thing that makes you fall into depression is YOU. It is better to surround yourself with loved ones, have fun, dance, help others...than wallowing yourself in deep thoughts of uncertainties. Addiction is a compulsive, chronic, physiological or psychological need for a habit-forming substance, behavior, or activity having harmful physical, psychological, or social effects and typically causing well-defined symptoms (such as anxiety, irritability, tremors, or nausea) upon withdrawal or abstinence. * Appearance, A type of Power! The way we present ourselves plays a key role for respect and acceptance in the society. A Decent Appearance gives us an aura that generates the good qualities we might not possess in us. Firstly, It judges our personal image before any chance is given to identify who you truly are. And then, it becomes the pathway for acceptance or rejection. We mostly imitate habits and cultures that ends up influencing our image negatively. A personal image is important because most people will judge based on the first impression that they get from you. A good personal image will ensure positive, lasting first impressions and can lead to many benefits, including a better job, an easier social life and more opportunities. All in the bid to attain success or fame, the one thing we can start with to being a person of purpose without a question of behavior or decency is by Breaking the Cycle; Find solace in God instead Find yourself (Self Discovery) Saying No to Negativity Taking chances for great opportunities; Job, Family, Business, Relationship etc Embrace Decency Achieve your goals Be Enthusiastic and Optimistic Find cure for any addiction Earn Respect Be Trustworthy Learn to love yourself and others Live Healthy among others Click About MOMO to know more about the LIGHTHOUSE Project and get updated on new posts and write ups by signing up. Stay Blessed!

RUTH AJOKE BELLO (1961 - 2020) Our Beloved Wife, Mother, Sister and Friend was born on the 2nd of July, 1961 in the city of Lagos and Originated from Iperu - Ikenne Local Government. She was learned in Secretariat, Administration and Biblical Studies. She lived a wonderful life as an Industrious , Zealous, Loyal, Compassionate, Caring and a Genuinely Loving Woman with Strong Faith in Christ. She held her Family; Children, Siblings, Friends and Close relations in high esteem and always ready to offer herself in service to anyone, anyday and anytime. Her Greatest goal and passion in Life was to touch as many lives as possible through Christ in Service, Evangelism and Exhortation with Consistent Daily Devotions, Ministration, Counceling and Prayers. She lived in London for several years, worked as a Carer, looking after people with special needs and serving the less privileged. She met with the Lord in London and served him at House of Faith Church. She grew very quickly in her new Faith, very zealous and committed to growing and developing herself in the church by attending all trainings available for her spirituality. Her willingness and commitment to serving people was noticed, she quickly became a cell Leader and the Chief Usher at the Church. She was very hardworking, meticulous, supportive, peaceful, loving, diligent and disciplined. She Left London to be with her Children in 2018. During this short period of her arrival to Nigeria, she continued in her service to God at the Kingsway International Christian Center (KICC) Ikorodu. She completed the Kingsway Bible Institute (KBI) classes to be a fully pledged member of the church and joined the Evangelism & Outreach Department. We never wish to part this way and so sudden but we do not doubt that this is God's Plan for you. We will continue to uphold and live through the lessons you have impacted in our lives and pray that God grants you eternal rest and peace as you meet with the angels in Heaven. We Love You but God Loves you More. Farewell! Till we meet again. *Her Message to You* Since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the Blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, His Body; and since we have a great priest over the House of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the Full Assurance that Faith brings. Passed on: 17th of June, 2020 Aged: 58 Years Laid to rest: 20th of June, 2020 Survived by: Her Beloved Children and Siblings.

A shadow is a typical reflection of an object or person on another surface and controlled by the main image; a dark image projected onto a surface where light is blocked by the shade of an object. Mistakes are the most essential forces that drives us to success. There is no doubt that a mistake could be caused by negligence or unforeseen incident but its restitution is what is most important in our lives. A Mistake is significant to Failure; Failure helps us to identify our weakness (Lessons); Lessons brings out the best of our abilities. As humans, our self-reflection simply helps us predict who we are; physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally. We are controlled by our thoughts which makes us subject to either success or mistakes. A shadow signifies the reflection of our thoughts in the mind. The mind guides our actions to doing things positively or negatively with respect to self-reflection. Kindly click “MIND” to read on the impact of our thoughts in our lives. Mistakes are gifts. They offer you the opportunity to explore an area where perhaps you are deficient, need additional knowledge or training, or need to reevaluate your approach. - Julie Fuimano, Life tools for Women (Personal & Career Coach). What Makes You Different From Your Shadow? A shadow may appear in different shape or size compared to what position you find yourself. It does not give a reflection of your exact posture; its either you are bigger, smaller, taller or shorter. This explains the thoughts we carry in our mind and how we respond to them. In other words, a shadow of yourself gives you the privilege to see the outcome of your actions. You may be diligent at being able to notice your own undesirable traits and behaviors and acknowledging them, but are you sure you’ve tapped into every subtle thought and expression that comes from you. - Freethinking Guru, Enlightenment for the Rational Mind There is a saying that goes thus “What you see is what you get!” How do you see yourself? Are you aware of the undesirable traits and behaviors in you? It is best to get rid of any negative reflection in oneself and embrace the positive ones rather than allowing it destroy you. A Shadow of Mistake is created from the point where you allow a negative thought take possession of you. It passes a message to our Faculty of Reasoning – MIND, which is then evaluated by our CONSCIENCE; thereby promoting the consequence of an action. People who ignore their mistakes never learn. We have to realize our mistakes and develop habits to learn from them. Mistakes sharpen our mind, help us to focus on how abilities and motivates us to do our best. - Mohan Raj Sapkota, Jadibuti. ERROR SIGNAL Looking at a mistake caused by negligence, this definitely happens due to the ignorance of the warnings given by our Conscience. The Conscience is a default signal that alerts us from our Mind of the possibility of causing an error or making a mistake when an action is considered. Once you start ignoring your mistakes, it eventually leads you to repeat them. And gradually you start to get accustomed to it. As a result, this habit instigated you to make same mistakes umpteen times. - Shristina Shrestha, Sinamangal Kathmandu Looking at mistakes caused by unforeseen incidents, this could have happened due to lack of knowledge most especially and causing you to learn from numerous trials or training. It is natural for every individual to make mistake in some part of their life. Mistake simply happens. How hard we try not to make any mistakes but we fail as they aren’t meant to be stopped totally. The only thing we can do is stop such mistakes from happening again and learning some lessons from them. It is said that mistake isn’t the problem, repeating the same might be troublesome. - Manish Maharjan Kindly click “CONSCIENCE” to read about the impact of our actions to the mind. Embracing Your Mistakes The Best approach to correcting a mistake is by; Ø Knowing the existence of a mistake As humans, we are prone to make mistakes regardless of how perfect we see ourselves. Majority of our experiences and goals are initiated from some mistakes that cause us to keep trying with our strong desire until such goal is met or skill is sharpened. Ø Being aware that a mistake was made A mistake literally has a negative effect when it’s made. It either makes you feel miserable, incompetent or ineligible as the situation may seem. Finding out the errors made and the things done wrongly should be the first approach to correcting a mistake. Ø Accepting the Consequences and Full responsibility When you become aware of a mistake, the next step is to accept you did something wrong and find ways to rectify the situation. Be responsible for your actions and don’t blame others for your mistakes. Ø Finding ways to improve yourself There are various ways to improve yourself in other to avoid repeated mistakes such as; Counseling, Training, reading motivational books, listening to inspirational speakers, Eliminating undesirable traits or behavior, Consistent learning and knowledge expansion.

In Conclusion to the series (Journey to Self Discovery), Let us not avoid the factors that can hinder us from discovering our capabilities as much as we want to be a better person. Below are stumbling blocks to self-awareness which would affect your decision to living a good life and fulfilling your dreams. Facing your Fears You might not be willing to face the demons that terrifies you to finding out your true worth or makes you feel not wanted by people. Rather than examining your life, you would prefer to stay unaware or unnoticed and pretend to yourself that everything is fine. Quoting a famous blogger; “When you avoid the process of self-discovery, you are basically in denial of your authentic self. Behind the façade and outward appearance are your sabotaging thought and beliefs.” A typical example is a smoker who knows smoking is dangerous to the health but chooses do it because it is the only antidote to depression or keeping a sane mind according to his belief system. At the aftermath, he eventually regrets not stopping the habit sooner when death is staring him in the face. Not judging anyone with the above example but just a way of calling a spade, a spade without beating around the bush. You know that particular demon in your life that keeps staring you in the face and tells you not to bother making any changes because it is the only best life you can live. This only hinders the chances life has to offer you, by not going away from those bad habits and moving into the better life. If you are in doubt, look for people with similar experience and compare their lives to what it was before and now; either good or bad. It will help you decide on which path to follow. It is best to face your fears now, to know your worth and value yourself than ignore the possibilities of living a great life. Not loving the real you Self-Love is a prerequisite to the values you set for yourself. It is possible that you have the mindset of being a bitter person based on your experience in life and fail to absorb the lessons or let go of what you have being through. There are so many cases of failed relationships that leads to the partners believing it is a particular bad character they have, which deprives them of having a good relationship. They often stop dating or continue spreading the bitterness to the next person in line. This is not a good way to live. Why not discover those bad habits challenging your relationships and find ways to correct them. Love yourself first regardless of people’s opinion about you. It gives you the energy to go out there and find solutions to your defects. There is no point pretending to be someone else or living other people’s lifestyle to be what you are not. Most people tend to adopt traits, ideas or behavior of people and emulate it for themselves. They believe there is nothing worthy to change or correct about them due to low self-esteem. Get to know your own strengths and weakness to help discover your true self. Another way to love yourself is by celebrating who you are. Take time to find out what makes you excited or fun to you. Go to places, meet people and get yourself gifts to inspire your living. Busy Life There is so much stress in your life which doesn’t give you time to discover yourself. You have a 9 to 5 job and always on the run to meeting your deliverable. Even when you get home at night, you are too tired to do a little self-reflection. No time to take note of the things you want for yourself but rather for the company you work for. Recovery Strategies Understanding what you want in life and work towards it. Clarifying our core values to get the exact picture of who you are. Find inspiration from reading motivational books or listening to great speakers Spend time for self-reflection By now, you should have taken notes of your answers to the real definition of who you are, your plans to being a better person with well-defined values and how you intend to achieve your goals by understanding the purpose of life. Thank you for reading.

In this journey of self-discovery, it will be good to affirm your desires and what gives you joy to fulfillment along the way. You can identify your needs and goals but should have this feeling of excitement and enthusiasm, just by thinking about them. Happiness is what motivates you or gets you going to achieving your goals, fulfilling your dreams and impacting the world. It is a feeling of blessedness, delight, good luck, prosperity or pleasure of doing something passionately with our whole being. It should be considered firstly in every aspect of our lives or whatever we find ourselves doing. We all have that one thing we do that gives us joy or passionate about. It can be our job, talent or hobbies. People often say “be in a job you love”. Of course, you will love and enjoy what you do if you take time to identify that skill you have, enjoy doing and work in line with it. This is how you make yourself happy and inspired to do other things has the ideas come, thereby establishing good success in your life journey. Most of us have a passive lifestyle - tend to please others even when it hurts or not comfortable, just because we don’t want to hurt other people’s feelings or make them think badly of us. We do everything to please them without considering our own happiness. It only makes us miserable and regret not taking the right actions. This doesn’t mean you should trample on other people’s feelings just for them to please you as well. It will also be selfish of you to think of yourself only and not consider other people’s feelings. There should be a balance for both parties happiness. Your true happiness depends on how you have positively influenced the lives of people around with your right actions. Watch out for the next post as we talk about the hindrances to self-discovery! Thank you for reading.

First and foremost, Trying to define your true self and set standards for living a good life, it is best to identify your distinguishing features (Character) which helps you translate to VALUES. Value is the quality that renders something desirable, highly esteemed in one’s morals or belief system. It is the worth you carry that makes you better or draw people to you. Character is the deeper nature of an individual (either good or bad) derived from accumulated experience. It is usually based on principles rather than just acquired habits. Values are the preceding principles laid down to guide the individual’s character with no compromise thereby getting people to be interested in your abilities or skills. Focusing on the good side, a person’s character can be Punctuality, Empathy, Cooperation, Accountability etc and Values may includes but not limited to; Honesty, Respect, Obedience, Integrity, Humility, Compassion, Perseverance, Generosity and so on. How you behave or comments you get from people can be a way to define your true characters either positive or negative. Sometimes, people’s opinion about you might be wrong but in one way giving you the privilege to examine yourself. For some of us that already know we have some negative character, it is best to retrace your steps now rather than depriving yourself of living your best life going forward. You can still influence people’s lives positively with your experience. In fact, it is the best way to teach others how to go about their circumstances based on your true life story. Our values should be showcased everywhere we find ourselves or any opportunity we get. It can be at your workplace, meetings with friends, in your relationship or social gatherings. Be known for that spectacular value you bring to the table. It helps to earn people’s trust and attention to get things done with no doubt of good morals. Watch out for the last question as we continue in the series - Journey of Self-Discovery. Thanks for reading.

This question also simply means "What is your Mission?". According to Jeremy Adam Smith, Many seem to believe that purpose arises from your special gifts and sets you apart from other people—but that’s only part of the truth. It also grows from our connection to others, which is why a crisis of purpose is often a symptom of isolation. Once you find your path, you’ll almost certainly find others traveling along with you, hoping to reach the same destination—a community. It is very important to know both your Vision and Mission in life. As written in the last post (What's your vision?), knowing who you are and writing down your goals are the first steps to defining what your vision is in life. Vision and Mission work together in Self-Discovery. As observed among friends and family, we just go along daily routine; Go to work, do some exercise, make a living…without understanding the need for all these things they do. It simply means not having an idea of your existence in life. Wait a minute! I am not saying these things are wrong but we should have specific goals to achieve these things. Let’s use a 9-5 worker as a case study, why do you work to make a living? Did you just finish school and you feel the next thing to do is get a job to earn money because that is what others are doing? As a person, you need to identify your potentials that would help you understand the exact things to focus on in your life. Don’t just follow the crowd. You might also find yourself wanting to please other people and not being confident of your needs and aspirations. You are only helping others to fulfill their dreams instead of focusing on yours. It is not bad to learn from people while you build your skills to fulfilling your own dream. You can be an employee for so many years before starting your own business while some are gifted with the skills to start as early as they can. It is not too late to find your true purpose in life. Ways to finding Purpose (written by Jeremy Adams Smith) Read: Reading connects us to people we’ll never know, across time and space— an experience that research says is linked to a sense of meaning and purpose. Turn hurts into healing for others: finding purpose is not just an intellectual pursuit; it’s something we need to feel. That’s why it can grow out of suffering, both our own and others’. Cultivate awe, gratitude, and altruism: Certain emotions and behaviors that promote health and well-being can also foster a sense of purpose—specifically, awe, gratitude, and altruism. Listen to what other people appreciate about you: Giving thanks can help you find your purpose. But you can also find purpose in what people thank you for. Find and build community: we can often find our sense of purpose in the people around us. Tell your story: Purpose often arises from curiosity about your own life. What obstacles have you encountered? What strengths helped you to overcome them? How did other people help you? How did your strengths help make life better for others? Trust me, you can’t figure it out alone. Try asking God too. He is the one who created you and has given you a purpose to live on earth. It is better to find out than keep wasting away till God calls you back to him. Then you won’t be able to make an account of how what you could have achieved or the impacts you ought to have made while on earth. Watch out for the next post as the series (Journey of Self-Discovery) continues. Thank you for reading.

A vision is the bigger picture. Your life’s vision defines who you want to be, what you want to be known for and the set of experiences and accomplishments you aim for. Your vision helps define the goals by giving you a framework to evaluate those goals. Your vision becomes your why. We often follow the lead and not take cognizant of what we hope to achieve with our own lives. We all have our gifts from God or talents we are not aware of. Looking at the world and the people in it, you will agree with me that we have our different gifts in its own unique way. While defining who you are, it is better to note your goals in life and allow God to take the lead as you progress. Many of us don’t even have an idea of the skills we have until we find ourselves in that challenging situation that helps us discover our capabilities. For example: As a lady, you have never bothered to cook just because you feel you were not taught and then you condemn yourself by not finding out how poor your cooking can be. It is possible you only need to try once to be convinced of your abilities. After so many wasted years of not trying, that day will come when you don’t have any other choice but to get it done. Then you realize your cooking can be better if you continue doing it. With respect to our vision, we all have that one thing we desire to do which keeps coming to mind or gives us sleepless nights. You Imagine yourself doing it but can’t summon the courage to start or do it in real life. It can be as a result of not having the abilities or resource to accomplish that vision but surely believe in yourself to do it one day. Instead of waiting, why not find ways to sharpen your skills. Just like someone who wants to be a lawyer and decides to go to the university or law school; an entrepreneur goes to a business school; a cosmetologist goes to a beauty academy; an inspirational speaker reads books and listens to great people. What is that particular thing you want in life? Note it down and start learning those skills you need to help you achieve that vision. Watch out for the Next post as the series (Journey Of Self-Discovery) continues. Feel Free to drop your comments and questions. We will get in touch. Thank you for reading.

In Continuation to our previous post in this Journey of Self-Discovery, there are 5 critical questions to inspire the necessary actions to be taken towards discovering your true self and ways to eradicate any abnormal or improper way of living. The First Question is WHO ARE YOU? This is a very deep question that should be responded to with the whole of you. Think with your heart, note down the good/bad habits, daily routine or try asking your friends and family. You might think getting people's opinion is not a good idea but it will help to weigh your thoughts VS what people around you think of you. Getting to know who you truly are should start by tracing your steps back to the beginning of your journey in life (when you were born). There is a big difference in what you were 10 -15 years ago compared to who you are today. You might have lived a good life and still hope for a greater future or been through so many hurdles and wish to find a path to a better life. You can start by distinguishing yourself from the past, embraced the true person you want to become based on your abilities/interpersonal skills and build your future. Define your Abilities - the things you know so well or do right and gives you joy to keep doing – Your Passion. Don’t forget to note the wrong things you do as well, it is wise to identify your past mistakes and correct them while you retrace your steps. Begin a Daily Routine that will direct your path and guide you in fulfilling your dreams till you get to that place God wants you to be; the main purpose for bringing you to this world. Focusing on this question, it is not enough to believe your good character is the true person you are. Character is just a tool for living and gives people different perspectives of who you are which you are not aware of. Self – awareness is the act or process of understanding or having a knowledge of oneself. You cannot be an adviser or counsel other people to have an impact in their lives, if you are not aware of your own self. Watch out for the Next post as the series (Journey Of Self-Discovery) continues. Feel Free to drop your comments and questions. We will get in touch. Thank you for reading.

Self-Discovery is the affirmation of one’s potential, principles and personality in this lifelong journey by finding out who we truly are, our purpose in life to achieving our hopes and dreams for the future. Let’s start by asking ourselves some important and absorbent questions. Think deeply, meditate on it or go way back to the beginning of your life before answering. Questions: Who are you? What's your vision? Do you have a sense of Purpose? What defines you? What makes you Happy? These questions are eye-openers to whatever you are going through in your life at the moment and might be so hard for you to answer immediately. It is okay to give a wrong definition of yourself at this early stage but at the end of this series, you will have a good understanding of yourself. In Conclusion, the Hindrances to Self Discovery will give you an insight on why you need to start living your best life. You will be inspired for a positive change in your life. Thank you for reading.

What is life all about? I keep asking myself every single day what this life is all about, but I found no answer to this question till now. I searched newspapers, books of repute, asked friends and people around me perhaps they could tell me the answer to the question I kept asking myself every single day. But I got different opinions and views to the concept of Life. I have chosen the following affirmations; Life is all about fulfilling purpose. What matters at the end is the purpose of life. Did you do what was right at every point in time? Did you serve God with a pure heart? Life is on purpose, every created soul is assigned. From the religious aspect, we are created to serve God. Same way engineers design machines to solve a specific problem, so has God created humans and given them different space to fill in whether in the family, community, society, office or the entire world. Man will continue wandering about if he fails to identify his purpose. And until this purpose is realized, Man shall face challenges, endure pains, struggle hard, be spiritually awake whilst seeking God's guidance and support. Once the goal is achieved, happiness is found and the persons’ life, fulfilled. From the religious aspect also, our purpose in life is to worship God in truth, every other thing is secondary .Life is beautiful, enjoy it! Life is what you perceive it to be. Knowing and accepting this will help you realize the significance of your existence, having to be purposeful, your prowess, weaknesses, challenges and aspirations. It's all about understanding the above, knowing where you stand and your perspective irrespective of the norm. Life is all about impact you make, one at a time. No matter how long you spend on Earth, what matters most is how many lives you touched. Some who live for a hundred years will be forgotten easily if they had no positive influence on anyone. On the other hand, someone who lives for so many years will be remembered by their good deeds and contributions to the world. Life is also about “Pursuit of Happiness”, everyone wants happiness. Sometimes the reason for wanting the happiness may remain elusive, but we are built to naturally seek fulfillment in things which are higher than us. But no matter the chase, life can only be truly lived when we spend time trying to draw closer and be pleasing to GOD, the Highest Authority. Life can be lived well by serving God and humanity, there can be no greater fulfillment than what comes from loving God and seeing ourselves as ONE in togetherness. From my own point of view, life is much more than getting a good education, job or starting a family. We are all on a journey with a given task to achieve called “Destiny”. We all have different paths and tasks in life. But what makes all this special is that gift we all have. We are gifted in our own little ways which can turn big if we work on or towards it...? Some people died with their gifts without realizing what they lived for or the purpose of their journey in life. Some lived a life of regret; because they didn't give it a try at all to see if it will work out for them. Some did give it a try but could not finish the task due to self doubt. While some made it in life through their dreams, impacting one way or the other in the society they lived which turns around to inspire thousands of people all over the world. Here I am with mine! What is yours? Have u realized it yet? Have u given it try??? You can start from anywhere, don’t doubt your strength. Push harder. Don’t give up on life until you achieve. You can achieve it all when you set your mind to it. The road to your journey may be rough at first, but with time the road will be smooth, there is nothing like a smooth mountain and you will be happy that you did something worthwhile with your life. About me: Writing gives me joy. Be it; script writing, songs, articles, business plans and so on. I enjoy reading books as well, whatever will inspire me and remind me of who I am and what my real purpose is in life. Don't let anyone tell you...you can't, prove them wrong that you can. Let it out, that other side of you that wants to do good and great things in this life. Go for it now. Anything that will make you happy, give it a try and see where it will lead you to. It's better to try than regret not trying it at all. Let's live a life of fulfillment. We all have a role to play in this life. Your life is a signature in the sands of time. Written By: Abdulfatai Shakirat WFDS Motivationals

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